How to Date in Modern Society?

Started by Skipper

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#1 •••

As a Zoomer, I am torn apart trying to figure out how to find a wife with all of the ideologies and cultural influences popping up around me.


Manosphere tells me to act tough, be dispassionate, not truly care for the woman, and and spread my genetic information across the nation.


Feminism tells me to be nice and put the woman on a pedestal (who then resents me for not being more "manly" per se.)


God tells me to pray and wait, but how long do I wait?


Also, with the Western idiocy influencing how women act, how can I trust any of them? Seriously, it is hard to find a woman who doesn't have too much sexual angst, knows what she wants, is mature, respects herself, and is not entitled.


The dating sphere of my generation is terrible.

How do I know my wife will not divorce me? How can I find a virgin (which btw is practically and biologically the best kind of wife with children in mind)? How do I find a woman who does not think marriage is slavery?


Thank you America for starving my love life.


The more I imply my interest in a woman, they then pull back. Society tells them to not get married. Is that the reason for their actions after realizing I want to be more than friends? I become friends with women pretty easily I'd say. But what tends to happen is, unless they already have a boyfriend so I understand, they become more distant than before.


It's so hard to trust women knowing the ideas they are exposed to.


Is their reluctance because they have a hard time trusting me as a man because they know the ideas I am exposed to?


I know much of the toxicity of the despicable cultures comes from trying to upset the natural order and destroy the purpose of man. If you destroy the men you destroy the society. That's what the bad societies truly want.


What am I to do with all of this? It's never been harder to find a good wife and raise a family that benefits the world 🤷‍♂️

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#2 •••

I feel for you man, I think it's social media that fucked it all up for you.


It was a hundred times easier for my generation; you just conked her in the head with a club and dragged her back to your cave.


Here's a metaphorical that demonstrates how much easier it was for my generation, maybe it will help.


A businessman decides that it is time to hire a new secretary and has it narrowed down to a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette. Unable to choose between the three of them, he decides to conduct an experiment. At the end of the day he places a five dollar bill on the ground in his office to see how each girl would react. The blonde sees the money, picks it up, and places on his desk and then walks out. The redhead sees the money but ignores it and walks out. The brunette sees the money, looks around, and puts it in her pocket before leaving.


Which girl did the businessman hire?


The one with the largest breasts of course.



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#3 •••
@Skipper
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#4 •••

Go to a church, you can find a lot of women with that profile you are looking for.


Personally, I prefer to find a wife in the rural area. They are very likely not polluted with the urban shit like feminism and this kind of stuff.

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#5 •••
@SatanLucy


SatanLucy wrote:
I am an expert in all fields of logic and science, including in the area of love and relationship (scientific term: usefulness exchange trade).

People meet on tik tok more than on any other app or site. So yeah, give it a try there.

As for what to do, I guess just be useful.


"Just be useful" sounds so purposeful to me. It's like the perfect answer to me asking "what I should do with my life?" Just be useful. It's simple and fulfilling and can cure depression I'm sure.


Also, besides me trying to search for a wife or girlfriend at first, I can just focus on being useful to society which will keep me busy with learning new things. I also want to be useful for my own benefit. If I can operate better, than I benefit foremost.

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#6 •••
@SatanLucy

I am wary of online dating because it is linked to hook up culture. But I know people that meet online and have been together for years, so I know it can work for instigating long-term relationships.


Hey Siri, what's the Christian version of Grindr? I need to find a wifey

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#7 •••
@Sidewalker

Sensible business choice. You want attractive secretaries, lol.


I know which woman you chose too, ha.



Social media has provided much detriment like false expectations, formation of bad habits, de-socialization, apathy, misinformation, disinformation. There are benefits, but, man I know first hand how it retards people's way of thinking, observing myself and others around me. It makes them regress from critical thinking--in the way they use it though. Social media is a tool, an outlet for communication and connection. It's utilization has been abused unfortunately.

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#8 •••
@Misterio

This stuff would've been much much easier in high school. I could've had a girlfriend then. My social skills are infinitely better now and people make a lot more sense, so appealing to a woman would be smooth.


Maybe I should find a woman from a third world country who has never heard of feminism? It's going on the Bucket List fellas

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#9 •••
@Skipper

Yep, plenty of foreign women looking for a meal ticket...I'm guessing, plenty of homegrown ones also looking for the same.


So, the species base drive to procreate has long since been overthought, and now there is a slow realisation that the old marriage and relationship concept is actually just made up shit.


If all that you are after is a guaranteed, partnered, regular release of sexual tension, find yourself a good looking bloke who's looking for the same...And if you fancy the stress of kids there are non-conventional avenues that can facilitate your requirements.


Failing that, your best bet would be a move to Djibouti.

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#10 •••
@Skipper


Skipper wrote:
Maybe I should find a woman from a third world country who has never heard of feminism? It's going on the Bucket List fellas


Eddie Murphy says that won't work.


Eddie Murphy Raw: Unfufu

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#11 •••
@Skipper
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#12 •••
@Skipper
Manosphere tells me to act tough, be dispassionate, not truly care for the woman, and and spread my genetic information across the nation.


Dumb advice.


Feminism tells me to be nice and put the woman on a pedestal (who then resents me for not being more "manly" per se.)


That's not what feminism tells you. That's feminism as seen through a patriarchal lense. Feminism tells you to treat women as equals.


Seriously, it is hard to find a woman who doesn't have too much sexual angst, knows what she wants, is mature, respects herself, and is not entitled.


Do you think women don't have the same concerns?


How do I know my wife will not divorce me?


As someone that has been married for 27 years, let me assure you, you don't. Marriage takes two, so does divorce.


How can I find a virgin (which btw is practically and biologically the best kind of wife with children in mind)?


Unimportant. Virginity is not a prerequisite of pregnancy. If it were, multiple children with the same partner would be impossible! 😉



How do I find a woman who does not think marriage is slavery?


Don't be a domineering partner.


Is their reluctance because they have a hard time trusting me as a man because they know the ideas I am exposed to?


You are kinda giving off a vibe that you might be in demand to a smaller select group.


I know much of the toxicity of the despicable cultures comes from trying to upset the natural order and destroy the purpose of man.


Case in point...


If you destroy the men you destroy the society. That's what the bad societies truly want.


Societies that want to destroy society are indeed bad...and non-existent.



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Take the risk of thinking for yourself, much more happiness, truth, beauty, and wisdom will come to you that way. - Christopher Hitchens

#13 •••
@SkepticalOne
Seriously, it is hard to find a woman who doesn't have too much sexual angst, knows what she wants, is mature, respects herself, and is not entitled.
Do you think women don't have the same concerns?

Well, most people are straight, so most women wouldn't be as concerned with finding a woman to date as men would be.


Semantics aside, did his post imply women don't have similar concerns dating? The post is written from a male perspective cause he's a man, but I don't see anything implying these problems only exist from that perspective.


How do I find a woman who does not think marriage is slavery?
Don't be a domineering partner.

Being a good partner requires having a partner, and Skipper's problem seems to be with finding one in the first place.

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#14 •••
@Sidewalker


Sidewalker wrote:

Skipper wrote:
Maybe I should find a woman from a third world country who has never heard of feminism? It's going on the Bucket List fellas

Eddie Murphy says that won't work.

Eddie Murphy Raw: Unfufu


Okay scratch that quest. When they come to America they all ask the same question "What have you done for me lately?!"


That was a good bit from Murphy

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#15 •••
@Savant, @SkepticalOne
Semantics aside, did his post imply women don't have similar concerns dating? The post is written from a male perspective cause he's a man, but I don't see anything implying these problems only exist from that perspective.


This is what I was going to say

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#16 •••
@Savant
Being a good partner requires having a partner, and Skipper's problem seems to be with finding one in the first place.


Yeah, it's something I'm wanting to prioritize more of late. Since I'm more concerned, I view failures or setbacks more seriously. But I wouldn't say I'm distressed; I just wanted to talk with you guys about it in relation to the soci-poli aspects and also catch up on the site

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#17 •••
@SatanLucy


SatanLucy wrote:
Also, besides me trying to search for a wife or girlfriend at first, I can just focus on being useful to society which will keep me busy with learning new things.

You also have to be useful to your wife or girlfriend, in some sufficient way. Be provider of things people want.


Yeah, you're right. I generalized too much what you said. Women sometimes complain men are useless, so doing useful things would negate that idea in their eyes hopefully.

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#18 •••
@Skipper

If you have the money to hire a professional photographer and a beautician and rent a suit, it might be worth it to get the best pics possible for a dating profile. Then pick the best ones with Photofeeler. One time cost but then you've got the pictures for a few years at least, and the photo quality might count for as much as your looks. Never tried it but I always assumed that was the optimal strategy. Online dating is harder for men in terms of numbers, but then benefit is very few people are putting that kind of effort into optimizing their photos, so you can probably do well. Especially if you pick an app less male-skewed like Hinge and filter by religion, the numbers might be more in your favor. Single women outnumber single men in Christian dating spaces.

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#19 •••
@Skipper


Skipper wrote:
Semantics aside, did his post imply women don't have similar concerns dating? The post is written from a male perspective cause he's a man, but I don't see anything implying these problems only exist from that perspective.

This is what I was going to say


This is an unnecessary defense. I am merely suggesting men and women deal with these same challenges. Sometimes, others fall short of what we need in a partner, and sometimes we are the one found lacking.

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Take the risk of thinking for yourself, much more happiness, truth, beauty, and wisdom will come to you that way. - Christopher Hitchens

#20 •••
@Skipper

Also, a big dick, a big bank account and a flashy car would help...Which is all a metaphor for alpha-male...Which is actually all that females are looking for, even though they might think that they have out evolved such base trivia.

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#21 •••
@SergeantLynch

It's all about the sixes: make six figures, be six feet, have six inches, and a six-pack

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#22 •••

I feel underqualified...

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#23 •••
@Savant


Savant wrote:
If you have the money to hire a professional photographer and a beautician and rent a suit, it might be worth it to get the best pics possible for a dating profile. Then pick the best ones with Photofeeler. One time cost but then you've got the pictures for a few years at least, and the photo quality might count for as much as your looks. Never tried it but I always assumed that was the optimal strategy. Online dating is harder for men in terms of numbers, but then benefit is very few people are putting that kind of effort into optimizing their photos, so you can probably do well. Especially if you pick an app less male-skewed like Hinge and filter by religion, the numbers might be more in your favor. Single women outnumber single men in Christian dating spaces.


I just recently updated my profile picture for social media because I finally had a new photo of me that looked decent. Of course, if I put in the effort, I would have had a satisfactory photo using your guidelines sooner if I wanted. I was with family and a photo was taken of me with my brothers, and I really liked it so I used it.


Pictures are mostly all people have of who you are online, so they are definitely critical to online dating

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#24 •••
@SkepticalOne

I see you are wanting me to be more specific. Sometimes I speak in nuance when I should be clearer.


Feminism tells me to be nice and put the woman on a pedestal (who then resents me for not being more "manly" per se.)

That's not what feminism tells you. That's feminism as seen through a patriarchal lense. Feminism tells you to treat women as equals.


What you said is feminism, I agree. The current feminist views have enabled women to feel a sense of superiority and entitlement over men. Unless this is propaganda, but I do see examples everywhere.


How can I find a virgin (which btw is practically and biologically the best kind of wife with children in mind)?

Unimportant. Virginity is not a prerequisite of pregnancy. If it were, multiple children with the same partner would be impossible! 😉


I know that virginity is not a prereq. What I'm saying is practicality in the instance that perhaps the woman waited and thus respects the concept of marriage more thus having a more secure, unified relationship with the husband.


When I said biologically with children in mind, there is a theory--that I believe in and has been tested--that the sperm from males in previous sexual encounters still affects the development of the child that a woman has with the father. I want my children to have only my genes and my wife's genes to protect the bloodline. I want to develop habits that affect the genetics of my children thus affecting the habits and genetics of their children and so forth. Ideally, my descendants will have better and better genetics as time goes on, and this is best executed by mothering a virgin.


How do I find a woman who does not think marriage is slavery?

Don't be a domineering partner.


Tying into what feminism has enabled women to do and think, I have noticed how there are people who think that if a man says that a woman should change something about herself or corrects her, this is automatically seen as overbearing control and abuse of power. It's a silly double standard because the women will then demand change of the man.


Historically, females are followers so this is not a sustainable idea.


What do you mean by "domineering"? Men are by nature the dominant counterpart, so if you are telling me I should act like the weaker counterpart that is stupid.


Is their reluctance because they have a hard time trusting me as a man because they know the ideas I am exposed to?

You are kinda giving off a vibe that you might be in demand to a smaller select group.


Let's not discriminate here. I love Catholics and those door-to-door salesmen Christians.


If you destroy the men you destroy the society. That's what the bad societies truly want.

Societies that want to destroy society are indeed bad...and non-existent.


When I said destroy, I meant ruin and degrade the statutes and ideals of the community. If men are weakened and misguided and un-confident, which is what certain forces are trying to manifest, then the whole society suffers greatly.


The feminist movement has brought about terrible outcomes, and we can talk about that if you're interested



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#25 •••
@SergeantLynch


SergeantLynch wrote:

So, the species base drive to procreate has long since been overthought, and now there is a slow realisation that the old marriage and relationship concept is actually just made up shit.


Are you saying that the ideals are human constructs and/or they are silly contrived customs?

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#26 •••
@Skipper

At least six...Though you are setting a standard that might not attract a woman of your dreams.


Though beware, women of dreams come with no guarantee of contentment anyway.

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#27 •••
@Skipper
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#28 •••
@Skipper
The current feminist views have enabled women to feel a sense of superiority and entitlement over men.

Feminism has allowed women to glimpse equal status. Potato/potatho 😉


I'm saying is practicality in the instance that perhaps the woman waited and thus respects the concept of marriage more thus having a more secure, unified relationship with the husband.


There is nothing wrong with wanting a partner to have shared values.


When I said biologically with children in mind, there is a theory-


This is an unwarranted belief ...unless youre a fly. It has never been confirmed or observed in humans or mammals of any kind.


What do you mean by "domineering"? Men are by nature the dominant counterpart


I think you might be confusing culture with nature. Anthropology reveals matrilineal and female-led societies, female warriors, and women with primary authority.


Domineering describes someone who is bossy, arrogant, overbearing. Someone who tries to control other people with no consideration of their feelings. Being this type of person/partner would make marriage seem like slavery.


Let's not discriminate here. I love Catholics and those door-to-door salesmen Christians.


I think the person for you probably does too.


When I said destroy, I meant ruin and degrade the statutes and ideals of the community.
The feminist movement has brought about terrible outcomes, and we can talk about that if you're interested


What community is that? Is it made up entirely of men? If not, then perhaps the ideals and statutes are incomplete.

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Take the risk of thinking for yourself, much more happiness, truth, beauty, and wisdom will come to you that way. - Christopher Hitchens

#29 •••
@Skipper
Are you saying that the ideals are human constructs and/or they are silly contrived customs?

Ideals and customs are human constructs. Some are silly.

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Take the risk of thinking for yourself, much more happiness, truth, beauty, and wisdom will come to you that way. - Christopher Hitchens

#30 •••
@Skipper
It's all about the sixes: make six figures, be six feet, have six inches, and a six-pack

I mean, in more traditional relationships, only height and money really matter off the bat, since they're not gonna see your abs or know the size of your privates until you've been together for a while. And while those things do matter, I think you can still do okay without them if you play the numbers game (cast a wide net) and optimize stuff you can control like outfit/photo quality. I think most women would prefer a well-framed photo of a guy in a suit than a mirror shirtless pic.

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