I think my parent is getting dementia

If your parents have dementia, 

educate yourself on the disease, prioritize open and calm communication by focusing on feelings rather than facts, and build a strong support system for both your parents and yourself. It is also crucial to get important documents in place, maintain a sense of normalcy by involving them in familiar activities, and to take care of your own well-being. 

Hmmm

Perhaps it isn't actually dementia, maybe they are just trying real hard to forget about you.

Yes, forgetfulness is a sign of dementia, particularly when it affects daily life, such as forgetting recently learned information, asking the same questions repeatedly, or misplacing items in unusual places. While occasional forgetfulness is a normal part of aging, dementia-related memory loss disrupts daily abilities and involves more frequent and severe issues. 

maybe they are just trying real hard to forget about you.

My parent 1 never even knew me. But my parent 2 seems to be losing stuff all the time and forgetting everything.

Dementia

Person 'best able to give a diagnosis would be a doctor I think.

But maybe it's also something that needs to be checked periodically to compare decline to past.

. . . Also I'd imagine people can sometimes be in earlier stages of mental decline, and are able to concentrate for a short period of time, such as an examination.

Maybe other medical tests can be preformed for certain types of mental decline.

I'd imagine some older individuals can also be in denial, if it ever happens to them.

Gradual, progressive changes I imagine.

It 'could just be stress and more normal effects of age on cognition.

Though assumably for your Dad, it was more obvious or a doctor stated it was so.

Burdens

It's not 'ideal when one has burdens in life.

Most people are a bit of a burden at times perhaps, I think.

Some people have carried me in life, and I've carried them some. Seems fair.

I also just love my family, makes me more willing to help them out when they have need.

. . . Course everyone has limits.

I also just love my family, makes me more willing to help them out when they have need.

I dont like my family, I am just stuck with them. I didnt choose who will give birth to me. If I did, I would choose to have some handsome billionaires who are also kind, to be my parents or adopt me.

One does not need to like someone to love them, I think.

But I can see where you're coming from.

Lacking a liking for family, could make one's situation more bitter I imagine.

I  dont like my family, I am just stuck with them. I didnt choose who will give birth to me. If I did, I would choose to have some handsome billionaires who are also kind, to be my parents or adopt me.

Not liking or feeling unloved by one's parents, often stemming from emotional neglect, abuse, or unhealthy family dynamics, can have profound and long-lasting negative effects on an individual's 

mental health, self-perception, and relationships. 

Psychological and Emotional Effects

1. Mental Health Conditions: There is an increased risk of developing conditions such as anxiety disorders, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and substance use disorders.
2. Low Self-Esteem and Impaired Sense of Self:Individuals often struggle with deep-seated feelings of inadequacy, worthlessness, and self-doubt because their core sense of self was not nurtured in childhood.
3. Emotional Dysregulation and Numbness: Difficulty identifying, expressing, or controlling emotions is common. Some may become emotionally numb or detached to cope with chronic distress.
4. Shame and Guilt: There can be persistent feelings of shame, and a person might blame themselves for the parents' lack of emotional attunement or the negative family dynamics.
5. Fear of Failure: Conditional love or constant criticism can lead to a pervasive fear of failure, perfectionism, and an intense need to earn approval. 

Effects on Relationships and Social Skills

1. Attachment Issues: A negative early parent-child relationship can lead to insecure attachment styles (either anxious or avoidant) in adulthood, making it difficult to form stable, healthy bonds.
2. Difficulty Trusting Others: Growing up in an unstable or unsafe environment can make it challenging to trust others, leading to guarded interactions or suspicion of kindness.
3. Poor Boundaries: Individuals may struggle to set or maintain healthy personal boundaries, making them vulnerable to being taken advantage of or leading them to be overly demanding of others.
4. Attraction to Unhealthy Dynamics: There is an increased likelihood of seeking out or tolerating unhealthy, codependent, or even abusive relationships (romantic or platonic) that mirror the dysfunctional parental relationship.
5. Social Isolation: Due to impaired social skills and a general sense of loneliness, some individuals may self-isolate or struggle to make friends and connect with people. 

Behavioral Effects

1. Self-Destructive Behaviors: Substance abuse, self-harm, and high-risk activities may be used as coping mechanisms for emotional pain.
2. People-Pleasing: A tendency to prioritize others' needs over one's own can develop from constantly seeking parental validation or approval.
3. Intergenerational Trauma: Without intervention, patterns of dysfunction can be passed on, potentially affecting how the individual parents their own children. 

Healing is possible through self-awareness, setting boundaries, and seeking support from mental health professionals, which can help an individual process these effects and develop healthier life patterns. 

Shame and Guilt

I am incapable of feeling guilt. Everything I do, I am able to blame on someone else.

Self-Destructive Behaviors: Substance abuse, self-harm, and high-risk activities may be used as coping mechanisms for emotional pain.

I dont do self harm, but I know a lot of people who do, and its sort of an addiction.

This describes your condition.

The condition of always blaming others is 

often linked to projection, a defense mechanism where individuals attribute their own negative traits and feelings to others. It can also be associated with poor emotion regulation, a victim mentality, and certain personality disorders like narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). This behavior stems from a need to protect a fragile ego and avoid guilt, shame, or personal responsibility. 

I do wonder, how long we'll have a period of history where we have extended the longevity of the body to a high degree, but not the mind.

The mind is simply the functioning onboard computer, and like the rest of our parts, has a pre-programmed limited duration.

Certain interventive techniques can prolong function, but as yet cannot prevent decline..

I see little other than selfish value in a world overburdened with decrepit humans.

I see little other than selfish value in a world overburdened with decrepit humans.

I heard or read once that socialize health care in UK will not spend higher cost procedures --MRI's etc-- on some elderly, whereas in US the elderly have easier access to more costly procedures.

I totally agree with the concept of spending less in care of elderly or those more incapacitated in older age.

What is older? What is more incapacitated etc. Some countries concerned --China, Japan etc-- not producing enough new generations to maintain their economic industrialization --includes intellect?-- going forward.

Solutions for global challenges often focus on sustainable development and population stabilization, which include ensuring access to family planning and reproductive healthcare, promoting gender equality, and educating the public on family planning and environmental issues

. Implementing sustainable development policies, creating a national population policy, and addressing consumption are also considered important strategies, according to Stanford University, Global Stewards, and BBC. 

Easy for academics to discuss, harder to explain it to 8 billion individuals.

The current global trend is still, procreate, demand medicine and expect to live beyond usefulness.

Which comes heavily laden with capitalist incentives.

I am reminded of two stories on old age.

The Law of Life by Jack London

https://learningenglish.voanews.com/a/law-of-life-jack-london-85563527/113958.html

The Wooden Bowl

https://www.moralstories.org/the-wooden-bowl

. . .

In a way I suppose it is 'ability to spend money on the care of older individuals.

I also think about public and/or private health care systems.

My father says he still wants to live, says he still enjoys living. Be 69 years old soon.

Even after he had a fall a couple years back that broke some bones, still hinders him, he still enjoys life.

I still want him to be healthy, am willing to help him out when he needs it.

. . . Though admittedly it's easier to help people in some moments than others, and at times, one can lose the ability or willingness to help, the worse a person and their situation becomes.

. . .

Selfish. . . I'm not sure I see it any more or less selfish as young people.

Many of us live by a mixture of for ourselves and for others.

Costly operations. . . Depends on one's ability to pay it, I suppose. Whether one thinks one 'should spend it.

Value of life and experience is subjective, but it seems wrong to judge for other people what they choose to spend.

Seems wrong to devalue it in others, encourage death.

I 'do wonder if the ravages of age might not soon become a focus of people's attention.

And the question on how people choose to meet it.

Technology makes us ever more aware of the world.

Medicine 'has improved the 'body, it's ability to last to an old age.

I'm more of the opinion, that medicine staves of death.

Not just for the elderly, but for a lot of much younger people.

Which to a degree depends upon luck, but also depends upon how one takes care of oneself.

Fortunately, over here in Wales UK, currently essential health care and medicine is free.

Though what is and isn't essential doesn't seem to be properly addressed, monitored or policed.

I work in the Pharmacy industry, and the amount of over prescribing and wastage is staggering.

Your father is 4 years older than me, and if he's anything like me he still has a lot of vim and aspirations.

I wish him all the best.

Hmmm. what's Trump's key to longevity? Oh, that's right , foreign sex workers.

( I can't believe that I'm not allowed to post nude pictures of Melania.)

China will reset the world order and dominate global trends.

Leaning, the point is about who is still productive for the community.

Worldwide we see population decrease concerns of not enough new people to meet the economics production technology going.

Ive seen it on news couple of differrent times. Partly if not wholely that is why China stopped its is one child per family some 20 years or so ago.

recently saw the same concern for Japans young people not making enough off-spring.

For those who do not produce food on the table, they will eventually be left behind as those who can still produce wealth --food on the table-- keep going on eventually leave those who cant produce behind, or die with them under differrent set of circumstances.

I feel bad for my two operations ive had, that, I could have gotten along without, tho I would have lived with more pain and maybe stopped working the kinda of physical work ive done to make a living --keep food on the table--.

It’s because she hasn’t aged well. Everything is starting to sag. It might make you turn to Barron.