So you play football with a rugby ball, it takes hours and hours, and thousands of people in ludicrous outfits.
And then you export it all over here for the benefit of those drooling bozos who dedicate their lives to the worship of the Televisual sport.
Some are even prepared to part with hard earned money to go to Wembley or Croke Park and watch it.
Over here we have football with spherical balls, which was bad enough when it was just blokes, but now we're also supposed to be glued to screens ogling butch babes in big shorts and long socks.
It's now all and endless succession of sexually undiscriminated ball manipulation.
Not that I mind a bit of ladies beach volleyball...Though the actual ball is a tad irrelevant.